There was a stretch where dating left me completely worn out. The endless swiping, the first dates that led nowhere, the sense of doing a lot and feeling less each time.

The shift came when I stopped listing what I wanted him to be, tall, successful, all the usual boxes, and started listing how I wanted to feel. Heard. Safe. Genuinely cared for.

So here is what I would tell you. Take a real break from the apps. Write down how you want to feel in a relationship, put it somewhere you will see it, and read it often. It quietly retrains you to recognise the right person and to let the wrong ones pass.

I met my partner not long after I made that change, in the most natural way, and it is the healthiest relationship of my life.